Nostalgia...

I have been in a state of nostalgia since getting back from my travels. I have lived with confusion in my heart about where I belonged and what is to come next in my life. I have so many dreams and aspirations but really have no idea where to start. I have been working here and living there but all without really getting somewhere.

As I reflect on my life I realise that I have accomplished a lot for someone my age. I also feel blessed to have had all those amazing opportunities come my way. For some odd reason though, I can't help but feel this sense of failure because I have lived everything but a stable life. Most of my friends have "land" careers, homes, relationships, and kids. I know that comparing my life to those who haven't been where I have seems like a sure defeat, but where I'm from, it's what people seem to do after college and not set out to discover the world like a nomad.

Although I would never give up my life for a stable one, I have a list of things I need to accomplish before I commit to stability. This list will ultimately lead to stability starting with doing another contract for Royal Caribbean (which feels right in my heart), buying my first vacation home (which will probably end up being my primary residence), go back to school (really because I love it), find a "land" job that makes me happy, scuba dive (because I'm passionate about it), do humanitarian work, and vacation all over the world. Somewhere in there I suppose spending time with the ones I love most would be deemed as appropriate.

I have been told my whole life that things always fall into place at one point or another. I just need to let time and fate do it's job and I'm sure I will feel this sense of security as I once did. Till then I will surround myself with those I love most and enjoy the time I have left with them before I set out once again. Afterall, they keep me grounded and make me feel complete! I will keep in mind through these confusing times that the past is history, the future is a mystery, and today is a gift, that's why they call it a present!

Photo courtesy of David Shillinglaw